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Feel the mortgage, act the mortgage, be the mortgage," a consultant from Unthinkable Solutions urges a cringing and bewildered sales team. Fortunately this is BBC Radio 4's comedy, Think the Unthinkable. Set among the barmier outreaches of corporate training, it is a huge step away from the reality - but the programme does reveal our mistrust of the woollier world of staff development.
When business hits a rough patch, it is this suspicion that encourages unenlightened finance managers to slash training budgets - probably at a time when they are most needed to chivvy up a gloomy staff. "A lot of clients are holding back at the moment," says consultant Jonathan Wilson of e-learning advisers, Academee, "and it's utterly wrong. You might improve the bottom line for that quarter - but not beyond it. We're not in a recession, but we're making it feel like one."
Companies gladly spend on perks, incentives and training when business is buoyant - but ironically that is when we have least opportunity to leave the nuts and bolts of work. Lack of time cripples staff investment - one of the greatest problems cited by the training industry is getting people to turn up in the first place. But even if we have more time when business slows, we squander it, says Marjorie Mair, a former PA and adviser to the Industrial Society. "People think 'keep your head down', they grow paralysed and spend their time 'awfulising' about what might happen rather than concentrating on their own development - which they still need to do."
As a nation we have a shabby record for feeling involved in the work we do. According to a recent Gallup poll, 63% of employees say they are not engaged enough at work, while 20% feel actively disengaged. And the longer staff stay with a company, the worse it gets. Part of the problem, says Marcus Buckingham, business author and global practice leader of Gallup, is that companies are wasting cash on training that is not tested or measured. "It isn't delivering what it is designed to do - if most organisations cut their leadership and management training budget, they wouldn't notice the difference. It's just not accountable."
But while in the past, company motivation schemes have been notoriously extravagant, few employees want to see them disappear. "Staff development is all the more important in a downturn," says Mair. "It's very easy to get depressed and not deliver. If you do invest and get people sparked up, you're a step ahead of everybody."
But the need for value for money has made companies far more rigorous in their demands upon suppliers of development and motivational tools. And employees are becoming more resourceful and proactive in getting hold of them. "We had a group of PAs who'd clubbed together and asked for a short session on creativity," says Octavius Black, managing director of professional trainers Mind Gym. "They'd convinced their bosses they'd be more efficient and productive. They weren't even away a whole day."
And while it may be naff to spend flamboyantly while others are suffering, drastic cutbacks during hard times are a dangerous move, says Craig McPhie, marketing director of communication and event management company Archer Young Marketing. "If you were rewarded with a trip to Mauritius with your partner last year, you're going to ask questions if it's a weekend in Brighton this time around. When companies are making people redundant, the last thing they want to do is to stop moti vating the remaining staff who are crucial to the business."
Where reward trips once offered staff a chance to play elephant polo in Nepal, or dragon boat races in Singapore, they can be tailored to more modest budgets by offering something completely different, says McPhie. "You can still give a unique experience, create something employees want to take part in, without going on a long haul flight."
Likewise, training and development departments have learned to do more with less. "The days of the stand-up, days-long training seminar are over," says Valerie Cooke, a manager at Avon Cosmetics. "We are getting cleverer and cleverer at getting value. And the free bacon rolls have gone."
Avon, in a trend echoed by other larger companies, draws on internal staff to lecture on particular skills, offers manned learning resource centres where staff can use books, CDs or consult staff in their own time, and arrange peer-to-peer training such as job swaps and secondments from work.
And a trend has emerged in staff development - if you don't ask, you don't get. Which is fair enough, says Sue Cook, a PA and chair of the Institute of Qualified Private Secretaries. "You have to take responsibility for your own career - even more so now," she says. "Find the time, cover for colleagues, help each other and find your own courses."
Those short on ideas would do well to consult the Campaign for Learning. The campaign encourages a variety of cheap and informal ways to learn, develop and stay motivated such as departmental desk swaps; e-learning; mistake-sharing sessions and skills swapping. "It doesn't have to be work-related," says its director Michelle Wake. "It could be salsa, rock climbing or cooking."
But are we not missing the point here? Part of the appeal of development, motivation and training is that it offers time out from work, a bit of fun, a chance to network and escape stressed offices? Not so easy when week-long courses are contracted into 90-minute sessions, or non-essential skills are acquired over a lonely computer in your spare time.
But if you believe Buckingham, rewards, perks and team-building trips are not the best way to develop and motivate. "They don't work," he says. "There's no evidence. It sounds obvious but the best way for a manager to engage an employee is to tell him or her what's expected of them, and to use their strengths to the best advantage. You do this with one-on-ones between manager and employee. That's better than money, courses or vague promises."
· For more information visit www.campaign-for-learning.org.uk
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